Jobs

I’m currently working for a carpentry and construction company. Before this I sold shoes.  I majored in Theology and have played poker on a professional level. I am a living testament to the fact that no matter where you are now you have no clue where you might end up.

I put too much pressure on myself to find my “dream job” or more realistically “dream line of work”. I’m in a place where what I want to end up doing or working towards is in constant flux.  

I was told I could be anything when I grew up.  When I was 3 I wanted to be a shark.  Sharks, as far as my toddler brain was concerned, qualified under the “anything” category.  When I was told that I couldn’t be a shark I was devastated.  I then decided if shark was crossed off the list, the next best thing would be a T-Rex.  I just wanted to be big and awesome and eat smaller things than me.  I even asked my parents to change my name to “Rex” to be the first step in my dino conversion.  It didn’t fly.

I'd watch this

When I was a freshman in high school all i wanted to do was listen to Linkin Park, Eat Taco Bell until i passed out, and play World of Warcraft I was slightly unmotivated.  Every adult always made it a point to ask me what I would love to do, but I knew my answer of pure lethargy and Taco Bell wouldn't reflect well on my parents.

After a lot of personal reflection my qualifications and expectations of an ideal career choice seemed even more unrealistic than me transforming my DNA into a T-Rex.  That’s okay though.  Not all is lost.  I’ve botched a few interviews for jobs I thought were a great fit for me. It’s odd having a calmness and peace about something that is on my mind multiple times a day that used to cripple my ability to be joyful.

As many days as I wake up early in the morning dreading working outside in the cold I need to choose to let the thoughts of hope and gratefulness win over the thoughts of complaint and the desire to sleep in.  All I can do is work hard, focus my mind on the right thoughts, and be thankful for all the things and opportunities I have now and will have in the future.  As stressful as figuring my life out has been the past year, the adventure has been much more rewarding than any sense of purpose or job can fulfill.

That last sentence sounds cliche but the greatness of it is in its truth.  Our goals and dreams are so oriented around discomfort, adventure, and conquering the world that when things go wrong or off the main path we bemoan our luck, crawl into bed at the end of the day and think about what decisions we could have made better in order to have avoided this difficulty. 

Our success lies in the crux of not letting the challenge defeat our hopefulness and resolve.  

If the things we wanted in life were easy to attain then we would have them already, and be unsatisfied with how simple it all was. We would want so much more. We would dream of a world of challenge.